In recent years, there has been a noticeable rise in the trend of young Nigerian men marrying elderly Caucasian women. While many of these couples insist their relationships are built on love and mutual respect, public perception in Nigeria often points to underlying economic motivations, ranging from the pursuit of financial stability and social mobility to the quest for foreign residency or citizenship. For many, such unions are seen as a strategic escape from the harsh economic realities at home and a pathway to a more secure and comfortable life abroad, writes VICTOR AYENI

The vicinity of the Federal Marriage Registry in Ikoyi, Lagos, pulsated with the vibrations of love as dozens of couples filled the arena on Wednesday morning.

Situated close to the popular Falomo Bridge on Alfred Rewane Road, the registry is one of the most well-known and patronised in the country, particularly attracting intending couples from the highbrow sections of the city.

At about 8:15 a.m., when our correspondent arrived at the registry, couples could be seen filing in, preparing for their court weddings, which are conducted from Wednesdays to Saturdays, excluding public holidays.

Although Tuesdays are reserved for oath-swearing ceremonies, couples who wed on Mondays or Saturdays are charged additional fees.

To ease the burden on couples, virtually everything needed for a seamless ceremony is available for hire at the registry.

From photographers, makeup artists, wedding attire and accessories vendors to drummers, music performers, and chair renters, there was hardly any wedding item that couldn’t be rented with a few thousand naira at the registry.

After receiving their marriage certificates, many newlyweds waited to take photographs in front of the bold green signboard that read, ‘Ministry of Interior, Federal Marriage Registry, Ikoyi, Lagos.’

One particular couple who posed for a photo shoot on the artificial grass underlay near the signboard caught the attention of our correspondent.

The groom, who appeared to be in his 20s, looked dashing in a fitted navy blue suit paired with a light blue shirt and a deep red bow tie.

Neatly groomed with a stylish twisted locs hairstyle, he exuded happiness as he stood with his arm around his bride, an elderly Caucasian woman adorned in a white wedding gown.

Beaming with smiles, the bride held a small bouquet of artificial flowers and a pair of glasses as she looked into the eyes of her groom with affection.

Registry requirements

Saturday PUNCH gathered that the trend of young Nigerian men marrying older Caucasian women has become so common at the registry that it no longer raises eyebrows.

“There’s nothing unusual about seeing an elderly person marrying a young man. It’s something we see every day, and we’re used to it. Besides, they’re consenting adults, and their families are not objecting,” an official at the registry told Saturday PUNCH.

Intending couples are first required to obtain and fill out a form called Notice of Marriage, on which their names are written clearly, and submit it to the registry within three weeks.

“When they return the completed form, we give them another set of forms, which include the affidavit needed to apply for their marriage certificates. They must also bring along their birth certificates or a declaration of age.

“After completing these steps, we issue a certificate of bachelorhood or spinsterhood. If either party has been previously married, they are required to submit a marriage affidavit and documents showing the number of children they have. These processes make it difficult for anyone to hide or alter their age,” the official added.

Saturday PUNCH learnt that intending couples are assigned a date for oath-swearing, and each is required to provide one witness on the wedding day.

The approved dress code includes wedding gowns and suits, as well as native or corporate wear. Short sleeves, jeans, and shorts are not permitted.

A TikToker defies social norms

Last month, popular TikTok content creator Victor Patterson (formerly Uchechukwu) stirred social media reactions when he tied the knot with an elderly American woman named Joyce.

On his TikTok account, the native of Isiala Mbano, Imo State, shared several videos from their traditional wedding in April and the ceremony at the Ikoyi registry where they exchanged vows.

The video drew a wave of criticism from commentators who alleged that Patterson married for pecuniary reasons, especially after adopting his wife’s surname.

“I know that’s right. That cheque cleared instantly,” wrote TikTok user Daniella Jose.

“Either draining the bank account or trying to get out of the continent,” Malkiyah said sarcastically.

However, others defended the couple.

“As long as the couple are happy, I’m okay with it,” Florence Uchechi commented.

“You never know how and when God will supernaturally bless you,” added Dianabey592. “At any time or place, happiness can come — at any age, size, or race. What we don’t understand or agree with, we should leave alone.”

Responding to his critics who accused him of marrying Joyce for money, Victor explained that his marriage was based on love for her, which he described as endless.

“I don’t think any Nigerian will be able to bear the pressure that is equal to what my wife has borne in my life. We were in constant communication for eight years, and I have now taken her surname as mine as well.

“When it comes to age, people will always say that age has nothing to do with the number, and that is what applies here. So many people are out there who are just like I am, getting married to older persons, but they can’t equally defend themselves when it comes to that, because they are scared of what people would say.

“But here I am, I got married, and I am so proud of my wife. I think that when it comes to marriage, love is what matters. Even if she is 30 or 40 years older, once the love is there, and both of you are ready to step into getting married, go ahead,” Victor added.

Responding to a question about why he didn’t get married to an older Nigerian woman, he added, “We have a backwards mentality among Nigerians. I asked someone during a live stream if I were to come ask his grandmother for her hand in marriage, what would be his reaction?

“People keep talking about the age gap, but it happens in the Western world. The difference is that they are more civilised and they don’t see it as a big deal. But here in Nigeria, we see it as a taboo.”

‘I received a prophecy to marry her’

When Nigerian singer Emmanuel Makuochukwu (popularly called ‘Ablack’) married Kay, a Caucasian woman who is 43 years older, in October 2024, not a few people were displeased.

The 25-year-old, in an interview on the ‘Love Don’t Judge’ podcast posted on YouTube last Thursday, disclosed that he met the 68-year-old American on Facebook and from there began texting.

“I went to the immigration, paid for a visa, which is $350, and booked a flight ticket; then she came to Nigeria. I had already made up my mind that this is the woman, and then I told her about a prophecy I heard, that a prophet said to me that I’m going to get married to a white woman, and here she is.

“When they gave me that prophecy, they told my dad that I’m going to get married to a white woman, that he should not worry about the woman. That’s how it’s meant to be. I believe in God. So that’s why I believed that prophecy.

“I never imagined I would date someone older than me. Some would say I’m married to my grandma, she’s too old for me, and some guys on the street said I married their client. Someone said I’m her toy. Our wedding picture went viral,” Emmanuel said.

The Pain crooner revealed that some netizens and bloggers mistook him for another music artist, Fireboy, and resorted to wrongly attacking Fireboy “for getting married to a sugar mummy.”

“Anywhere we go, people always like taking pictures of us. I don’t know, maybe it’s because they are seeing us on TikTok. I do her (clothing) style by myself. What she likes to wear is not what I want her to wear while we go out. So I have to dress her. Some people say she’s old enough to be my mum.

“Some said I’m married to my ancestor, or I married for the US green card. There are so many things, but I don’t care because I live my life. We are happy together, you know. I love this woman here so much. She’s everything I need,” Emmanuel added.

Recounting her initial feelings, Kay said she was very leery about being scammed when their relationship started after Emmanuel ‘liked’ her Facebook post.

“He went from somebody who liked my post to my very best friend. I could tell that anything and everything just kept getting stronger and stronger. I woke up one day wanting to go to Nigeria. I woke up from a dream, and all I wanted was to go to Nigeria. So, I told my sister. She said, ‘Kay, you’re crazy. Why do you want to go there?’

“I said, I don’t know. I told my stepmum about it. She told me I was crazy. She told my children. They all said, ‘Mum, you’re crazy,’ so I didn’t mention it to anybody else except him. I had trouble getting a visa, and he offered to do it for me. When he arrived at the airport to get me, it was like, ‘Oh my God, you are real. You’re here. This is not a scam!’ I was very wary about being scammed.”

 “Three days later, he proposed to me. But he was referred to as Fireboy, and I was referred to as an unknown Caucasian woman in her 80s,” she said.

Speaking about her past marriages, Kay also disclosed that she was nine years older than her third husband, while her second husband was 10 years older than she was.

“As for my first husband, we were the same age, but none worked out. Here (in Nigeria), the men treat the women so much better. I don’t know how it is with every marriage, but he treats me like a queen. I am his priority. If I want something, he buys it for me without knowing it. He picks it up and gets it because I liked it.

“And in the United States, you don’t get that. He calls my style ‘old lady’. I call his style ‘thug’. People say a lot of things, like I’m his sugar mummy, and he hit the lottery. They say, ‘She pays for everything, even that gold chain he wears on his neck.’ This is extremely immature,” the 68-year-old added.

Love or scam?

In October 2023, a Kano resident, Zaharaddeen Dansabo, shared photos of his wedding with an elderly Caucasian lover on X.com (formerly Twitter).

A caption on a court wedding photo posted on the crypto influencer’s Instagram on October 31 of the same year read, “I got married again today to the same woman for the second time in the same month.

“That’s got to be a record. I love her, so I finally put a ring on her finger. Please say a prayer for us. May Allah bless our union.”

A month before this, an X user, Abiginwa (@Abiginwa1), shared the photo of a man whom he described as his friend, who married a short Caucasian woman, both dressed in traditional attire.

In January 2022, an American TV personality, Phillip McGraw, popularly known as Dr Phil, shared on his Facebook page the love story between a 60-year-old American woman and her 20-year-old Nigerian soulmate, simply named Peter.

“The last eight months of my life have been my happiest,” the unidentified Caucasian woman said. “About a year ago, I met Peter on social media. He is everything that I had been missing in my relationship. Peter is the real deal. I’ve never met anybody like him. I have never met Peter face-to-face.

“Peter and I both have a lot in common; we both have a lot of passion. About five months ago, he asked me to marry him and I said ‘Yes.’ I have an engagement ring. My daughters and family are afraid that Peter could be scamming me,” the woman said.

She further disclosed that she would soon travel down to the country to get married to Peter.

“What in the world could two people with a 40-year age difference and living on separate continents possibly have in common?” a Facebook user, Terri Dunton, queried.

“The fact that he has no job should be a big red flag for her. So sad that she’s so desperate to fall for this.”

“I don’t see anything wrong. Nobody says anything when young girls marry older men,” Gladys Macharia countered.

In Nigeria, where being white and a foreigner from a Western country is perceived with assumed privilege and wealth, many Caucasians are often targeted by scams and financial exploitation.

“When the age factor is brought into the picture, it becomes clear how race, socio-economic class, and white cultural capital shape the way our people view interracial marriages.

While we can’t paint every marriage with the same brush, and bearing in mind that these are adults with the right to choose and to privacy, there is also the possibility that older, lonely women who are emotionally vulnerable could be targeted online and fall prey to younger lovers using marriage as bait,” a sociologist, Adekunle Kukehin, told Saturday PUNCH.

‘Men are avoiding commercial love’

On December 13, 2020, the wedding between 26-year-old Kano State-born Suleiman Isah and a 46-year-old American citizen, Janine Sanchez, made many tongues wag.

Janine, a chef based in Lindon, California, travelled to Nigeria for the wedding ceremony, which took place at a mosque in Panshekara, in the Kumbotso Local Government Area of the state.

The Imam of the mosque, Adam Abubakar, joined the couple after the bridegroom paid N50,000 as bride price.

The couple was said to have fallen in love after meeting on Instagram, and Janine, a mother of two, said the relationship started when Sulaiman exposed a scammer who attempted to defraud her via the social media platform.

“I didn’t respond because I have had experiences with Nigerian scammers,” Janine said. “There was a guy messaging me and Sulaiman knew he was a scammer. So he reacted, telling him to go get a job and quit scamming innocent people. So, I thought he sounded like a nice guy.”

Sulaiman, an indigene of Niger State who has since relocated to the US, said he had always dreamed of marrying a white woman and fathering mixed-race children.

The groom, who was said to have previously been in love with a Hausa girl, noted that his dream came true when Janine responded to his message.

Sulaiman’s father, Isa, a retired policeman, said he approved of his son’s union with the American woman as long as she allowed him to remain a Muslim.

In a lengthy X post, a former presidential spokesperson, Reno Omokri, explained that Nigerian women, especially Southerners, who complain that Nigerian men are marrying young and old European and American women because of the green card, do not understand what is happening in our society.

“A lot of these white women are educated, with degrees from either Ivy League universities or public universities. Most have jobs or run their own businesses, with personal and family money, and are not high maintenance either emotionally or financially.

“Yet, to marry them, these young Nigerian men don’t pay a bride price and, as is the custom in Europe and America, the bride’s family will almost certainly pay for the wedding. Now, juxtapose this with a Nigerian girl, educated or not, who brings little to the table besides her reproductive organs, and who has rather high maintenance, which is fed by an oversized entitlement mentality,” he wrote.

He claimed that the commercial love mindset exhibited by Nigerian ladies, forcing men to part with millions of naira in the name of marriage lists, has contributed to the pattern of men opting for Caucasian women.

“When greed becomes the creed, young men will flee. And that is what is responsible for the upsurge of young Nigerian men, mainly from southern Nigeria, marrying young and old white women,” Omokri added.

A marriage counsellor, Prince Okonkwo, pointed out that finances, or lack thereof, often play a part in the choices of suitors, which could be responsible for young men seeking comfort with older women.

“Men have been marrying older women without complex financial strings attached, but given the prevalent mindset among Nigerian youths and their desperation to leave the country, I would say that money and the prospect of a green card play a huge role in such marriages,” he said.